It’s that time of year again. Kids of all ages are getting both excited and nervous to head back to school. While most of that is normal, it is important to consider how the transition back to school can be especially difficult for some, particularly those who have been through tough stuff.

As a trauma-informed organization, we know that kids don’t leave their feelings at the door when they come to school. All that they have been through can and will affect how they behave, learn, feel, and create relationships.

So how can we as parents and professionals help support kids’ mental health?

We can NAG them (not in the literal sense; rather, use the word to remember the following approach):

Notice, Ask, Give.

N: Notice when a child seems off. 

A child who is acting out aggressively could feel unsafe or powerless. A teen who is shutting down may be overwhelmed with anxiety or depression. A kid who is constantly trying to leave the classroom might be stuck in fight-or-flight mode. Let’s take the time to notice every child, look past the behavior, and try to understand where the genuine feeling lies. This will help them feel safe, supported, and seen.

A: Ask thoughtful questions.

Instead of asking, “What is wrong with you that you are behaving this way?” we can ask, “What happened to you that is causing these big feelings?” and “What do you need from me in this moment?” Ask, “How are you feeling today?” If they seem unsure, take the time to help them name the feeling. Let them know that it is okay to have big feelings and that you are there to help them handle those feelings.

G: Give them predictability.

Routines help kids feel safe as they find comfort in knowing what is coming next. Give them space to calm down if they are upset. Give them the time and attention to process what is on their mind without judgement or haste. Give them praise for showing up. We can celebrate the smallest of wins and let children know we are here to support them through the good and the bad.

Mental health is just as important as reading and math. When kids feel safe and supported, they learn better, behave better, and feel better.

Remember that every child has a story. Some are carrying heavy stuff we cannot see.

Whether you are a parent, teacher, school social worker, or community partner, your presence matters. Let’s continue to lead with patience, kindness, and curiosity so that school becomes a place where kids feel connected and ready to grow!